The Dribble: Grades of the Series

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ICYMI: None of my (outrageous) predictions came true, but it did all go right for the Jazz as they ended up winning in a seven-game classic vs the Los Angeles Clippers.

The last time the Utah Jazz won a playoff series, Deron Williams was still good, Carlos Boozer wasn’t using spray paint to dye his balding head, and someone name Othyus Jeffers was on the roster. It seems like a lot has changed since then, so to review:

  • Donald Trump was giving interviews on how “very easily” he could change things as USA President. Process that: he’s been talking for seven years.
  • Apple released the Ipad, “taking the new technology of touch screen computing to new levels.”
  • I hadn’t even met my wife yet. Awww. #Totes #Presh right?
  • Toy Story 3 came out and made us cry for the right reason; Alice in Wonderland came out too and had us crying for the wrong reasons. Inception, though, was the real winner of 2010.
  • “Teenage Dream” by Katy Perry and “Airplanes” by B.o.B were the chart toppers. Stuck in your head, right?
  • Parks and Recreation was wrapping up their season finale, Lost was leaving everyone lost, Glee was getting started, and Sarah Palin had a reality show.
  • Baron Davis and Marcus Camby led the Clippers to 29 wins. DeAndre Jordan was on that roster too and was even worse at free throws: 38%.
  • And outside of the Jazz, the best thing of that year was Justin Timberlake promoting a movie on Jimmy Fallon and the two rocked the world with a history of rap. The quality of the video is awful, but the feel goods are still there. Where it all started:

Seven years later (some with Ty and Trey as a bad boy band duo) and the Utah Jazz just won a playoff series where they didn’t need home court, pace (so help me if TNT keeps talking about it during the next series) , fair officials (golly, they were awful. F grade for sure) or a defensive anchor named Rudy Gobert to beat the Clippers. That’s a weirdly true fact.

What else did the series teach us? The power of social media. Prior to the Sunday’s afternoon game, I was not looking forward to any more Steve Ballmer raptor arms.

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//platform.twitter.com/widgets.jsAnd ultimately, we got a Jazz win.

//platform.twitter.com/widgets.jsBut let’s give out some real grades.

Chris Paul – he didn’t graduate, again, and will probably be held back, again.

Quiz. Name a franchise that has lost five straight series leads in five straight post-seasons? Correct answer: Los Angeles Clippers.

At the helm of that franchise in those five years? Correct answer: CP3.

Look, they are a great regular season team as they are a lock to win 50+ and make the playoffs. Sports Illustrated pointed out the Clippers have had a 66% winning percentage (tied for third in the NBA) in the last five years. That’s awesome.

And Chris Paul is a very good player. He played an exceptional series with nearly 28 points a game and 10 dimes too. Those are Passing-The-Test-Even-When-You-Didn’t-Study-And-You-Feel-Awesome numbers.

And then the last last 24 minutes happened.

In game seven, on your home court, when everyone is knocking your legacy and you know this might be the last run with your core, you  are…. 1/9? For the biggest game of the season, the Win or Go Home series clincher,  he finishes…. with 13 points, 9 assists, and was -10 on the court? And he missed out on the Conference Finals, again? Sounds about right.

The Clippers would be wise to resign Paul and let him lob it to DeAndre for the next few years. If they do so, they won’t be winning no #RingZ but they would be relevant, get to the playoffs every year, and probably get some kids to think the Clippers are still cool (poor, poor, kids). And Paul? He says he wants to play where he can compete for championships, but if he resigns he’s getting the max, 200 million dollars, which may not buy #RingZ, but if I had 200 million, I’d buy:

  • 600,000,000 cookies from McDonalds (three for a dollar). I’d keep them in my jeep, drive around LA and give some to anyone wearing a Lakers or Clippers jersey (basically the same). They need something good every now and then.
  • I’d buy a corn maze and then hire someone to design John Stockton’s face in it. I’d also buy a helicopter and I’d go pick up Bill Simmons, who said the Point God wouldn’t be ranked in his Top 7 Point Guards ever and maybe not even his Top 10, and I’d fly him over the corn maze every day for a year.
  • I’d buy a swimming pool and fill it with doughnuts every week. It would be available for any Jazz player to rent out, or eat out, whenever they’d like. Come on, picture Rudy Gobert and Derrick Favors having a doughnut fight. PICTURE IT!
  • A neighborhood. Yup. I like where I live now, but there are some older homes that surround me. My wife is way too much into Fixer Upper, so we’d buy four houses and let her do that fixing up thing. One house for me (bball in every bedroom). One house for her (self-serve ice cream in every bedroom). One house for The Baby Boy (bounce houses in every bedroom). And one house for our dog (peanut butter walls in every bedroom). We’d build underground tunnels to connect us all, obviously, and in each house we’d have a framed picture of this (also obviously):

G-Time’s First Rodeo – it’s the biggest A+ The All-American has ever had.

Hayward, on the other hand, was awesome. I loved his attitude where he was looking for the ball and looking to make a play in the fourth. You could see that he was sick and tired of these Clippers and was just ready to be done playing them. He had said some (Nice-Very-Friendly-And-Kind-And-Considerate-Words-You’d-Definitely-Never-Repeat-To-Your-Grandma) words to CP3 early in the series, and after being hacked and hacked and hacked, he played game seven with physicality. I loved it.

Although we were up by double digits in the 4th, there was tension like the score was closer. The Clips (understandably) weren’t going away. With 8 minutes left, Hayward had the And-One. With four minutes left, he climbs high for a defensive board then hits a bucket on the other end. And with a minute left, he gets the last Jazz points of the game. He finished with 26, 8 boards, and was +13 (George Hill gets an A as well as he led the charge and was a  team high +21)

Throughout the series, Hayward averaged nearly 24 points, 7 boards, and 3 assists (which takes in account his sick game). He shot 47% from the field, 43% from beyond the arc, and 95%(!) from the foul line. He got it done. And he advances to the next round.

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The LA Faithful – they actually aren’t that faithful….and deserve an F

Listen, how do the Jazz win three games on the road, including the game seven?

  1. This Jazz team is cool, composed, and a lot more experienced than given credit. They have veterans who have been in big playoff moments (Hill with Indy vs LeBron’s heat, Joe Johnson in ATL, and Boris Diaw won a ring in SA). And Quin is actually pretty good, too.
  2. The Clippers home atmosphere is awful.

I like to think of it as a combination of the two, but let’s focus on the second. The Clippers have been the second fiddle in LA for forever. They share the gym with their older brother. Outside of basketball, you can go to a Los Angeles Dodgers (MLB) game, the LA Kings (hockey), the Galaxy (MLS), or even UCLA for anything. They also just added the Rams (NFL). Anaheim isn’t too far away and then you’re adding the Angels (MLB) and the Ducks (hockey). The point is: the choice is yours a Chuck-A-LA. Why would you become invested in the Clippers (especially during the decades of dark days) when these other ‘brands’ and teams are so readily accessible?

After game six, Doc and CP3 were using the post game presser to plead with fans to come in full force. Listen, if you have to ask for it, you are in dire shape. In fact, while upper bowl Vivint ticket sales were reaching a hundred bones a seat, the Clippers were using a group-on coupon to get some tickets to sell. That’s a problem.

The atmosphere was not rowdy and certainly was not intimidating. The Jazz felt like they could win there. And they did. Three times. That should never happen in a Best-of-Seven series.

But I’m sure glad it did. Let’s go Round Two.

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(Thanks for visiting The Tortured Fan! If you like what you’re reading, follow me on Twitter @JazzJunkie12 or go like The Tortured Fan Facebook page. Go Jazz!)

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